|Why is it so hard to hold abusers accountable? Because they follow secret “rules” of their own. We call them tactics. Rule #1 is “Deny all wrongdoing.”Speaking about moral values is a common deception tactic used by individuals without a conscience. It supports a respectable public persona, which provides a cover for immoral behavior. Read about DARVO.
Reader challenge: What is #2 on the abuser’s secret list of rules?
50 forms of abuse
1. manipulation (using love bombing tactics to lure or hoover!)
3. verbal abuse (name calling)
6. hitting, slapping, pinching, shoving, finger in your face, kicking, biting; physically or sexually!
7. sexual abuse-porn addictions, depravity, deviancy, objectification
8. withholding sex
9. silent treatments
13. walking away from you during a discussion.
14, purposely frustrating you in resolution to problems you bring up
15. changing subjects
18. NO EMOTIONAL RESPONSE TO YOUR PAIN and/or unusual response to the pain of others or to situations such as death or illness
20. ignoring repeated requests for anything
21. abusing in any way, your children or pets
22. stalking or monitoring you at work, at play or any other way
25. seeming pleasure at your pain
26. sexual coercion
26. coercion through alcohol or drugs
27. making you feel worthless, suicidal or deeply depressed
28. comparing you to others
29. purposely looking at other women in front of you
31. WORDS DO NOT MATCH ACTIONS, PAST OR PRESENT
32. shallow affect
33. sucking you in and then attempting to DESTROY YOU
34. asking for a negative behavior NOT to be repeated, but then it happens again and WORSE the next time.
35. insensitive to your thoughts and feelings
36. contrived or fake emotions of love
37. endless games, push/pull
38. Jekyl/Hyde personality
39. cog/dis in the relationship in order to survive it.
40. having an argument, then the psychopath pretends it never happened.
41. guilting you
42. shaming you
43. leaving you behind in places that are far away or dangerous
44. stealing your money, hiding money, lying about finances.
45. fostering an air of unpredictability, anxiety or stress.
46. calling, texting, emailing constantly under the pretentiousness of how your day is going or where you’ve been or where you are.
47. humiliation disguised as a joke
48. making derogatory comments about your clothing, your personality, sexuality, social status, financial status, friends or family
49. purposely creating drama and arguments as a way to degrade or upset you.
50. denial of your reality
Since, in the majority of cases, people who indulge in abuse are selective about whom they abuse, other people are typically surprised—or in disbelief—when hearing that someone is experiencing on-going and periodic abuse from someone they know and have always seen as nice and friendly. “Nice and friendly” is the persona of many conmen, abusers, and killers. Although many folks really are as nice and friendly as they seem, some most definitely are not.
- How Getting Robbed by Bernie Madoff Led Her to a Happier Life (dailyfinance.com)
- Mitt Romney & Bernie Madoff (hyperreport.org)
- Among Bernie Madoff’s Items Up For Sale: 10.5-carat Engagement Ring (since1910.com)
“Psychopaths see empathy, remorse, and a sense of responsibility—all the qualities usually considered as the epitome of goodness and humanity—as signs of weakness to be exploited.”
In the psychopath’s mind, each of us is either predator or prey.
Brain scans of teens with a history of aggressive bullying behavior suggest that they may actually get pleasure out of seeing someone else in pain.
While this may come as little surprise to those who have been victimized by bullies, it is not what the researchers expected.
The reason they were surprised is because the prevailing view is that these kids are cold and unemotional in their aggression.
“It is entirely possible their brains are lighting in the way they are because they experience seeing pain in others as exciting and fun and pleasurable,” said one researcher.
“We need to test that hypothesis more, but that is what it looks like,” he added.
According to Dr. Stout, author of The Sociopath Next Door
- Identifying the Adversary (twsp1.wordpress.com)
- The Authenticity and Effectiveness of Flattery (danerwin.typepad.com)
- Why We Love Sociopaths (3quarksdaily.com)
- Doc Bonn Explains: The Difference Between a Sociopath and a Psychopath (psychopathresistance.wordpress.com)
- Flattery or Fraud? (lisawieldswords.wordpress.com)
- Sociopaths and Psychopaths: Can They Be Cured? (phoenixsphere.com)
- Sociopaths R Us (lewrockwell.com)
- Guest Post: The Ascendence Of Sociopaths In US Governance (zerohedge.com)
- “Because most humans aren’t full-on sociopaths, alcohol and drugs are pretty much the only way…” (darkerme.com)
Greenwood rape suspect linked to robberies, assault
by CHRIS DANIELS / KING 5 News
Posted on June 30, 2011, updated Jul 1
SEATTLE — The man accused of kidnapping a woman off the street and raping her last week is also connected to a string of armed robberies in Seattle’s Ballard neighborhood.
Prosecutors say Jose Jimenez-Lopez is also a suspect in another assault and robbery of a woman. Additionally, federal authorities say he may be in the U.S. illegally, and have placed an immigration hold on him.
According to police, both Seattle police detectives and a female victim recognized Jimenez-Lopez’s face on TV when a surveillance picture of the suspect who attacked two women in the Greenwood neighborhood last week was released.
At 97th and Dayton, officers said two men hid in the bushes and jumped out to attack two women who were walking by. One of those women was abducted and raped.
Police said Jimenez-Lopez had a gun and cocaine on him when he was arrested at a bar late Tuesday.
“People who are preoccupied with validating a grandiose self-image find criticism highly upsetting and lash out against the source of it.”